


and when the sun is down, we'll shake and rattle our bodies

by WattStalf



Series: Commissions [277]
Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Dubious Consent, Gift Fic, Grooming, Hand Jobs, M/M, Possessive Behavior
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-01
Updated: 2020-12-01
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:20:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27824407
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WattStalf/pseuds/WattStalf
Summary: When Gon meets Kite, he goes with him, and Kite mentors him to prepare him for his exam. But as that day grows closer, Kite begins to wonder if Gon is as flighty as his father. He doesn't want to lose him as well.
Relationships: Gon Freecs/Kaito | Kite
Series: Commissions [277]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1325462
Comments: 2
Kudos: 20





	and when the sun is down, we'll shake and rattle our bodies

Gon leaves home young, letting Kite take him along with him. He feels a little bit bad about it, because Mito takes it rather hard, insisting over and over again that he is too young for this, but he isn’t sure how to take the news that she has not been entirely honest with him about his father, or what circumstances actually brought her to him. And he wants to see the world, now that Kite has introduced him to the concept of a world beyond what he has known, and he wants the chance to meet his father, and find out what, exactly, is so thrilling about being a hunter.

If the job is that great, then maybe he wants to try it for himself.

Kite is going to teach him, and train him so that he can take the exam when he is the same age that his father was. There are so many interesting stories to hear about his missing father, about his father that isn’t dead, that is very much alive, something that it seems like everyone in the world knows except for him. Gon knows now that there is a lot he does not know, and a lot that he is excited to learn.

~X~

In the beginning, Kite can try and convince himself that he is only doing this for the kid’s own good, that it has nothing to do with the slight resemblance to Ging, or the fact that he has not seen Ging in much too long. All he knows, in the beginning, is that Gon has spent his life up until now assuming that his father was ordinary and died prematurely, an ordinary death. It is almost offensive, to imagine someone saying something like that about Ging, but then again, Kite can’t exactly say that he blames the boy’s aunt.

He does know how much it hurts to be abandoned by him, when he settles on a new whim and vanishes without a word. But Kite does not offer Mito a life of adventure- not that she would accept it either way, he is certain. He offers that to Gon, because he sees Ging in him, and because he pities him, and wants to show him everything that has been hidden from him. When he thinks about it like that, it does not actually seem all that selfish, and he can tell himself that he is doing this for Gon’s sake, and no one else’s.

He can pretend that this has nothing to do with easing his own loneliness.

For a child, Gon knows quite a bit about the world. Maybe not the _world_ , in the sense of society, technology, and what goes on in big cities, the likes of which he has never seen, but when it comes to the natural world, the things that most people take for granted, going on all around them, Gon has picked up a keen sense for that. He has a lot of his father in him, despite never meeting him, and he shows a lot of promise.

Kite has no doubt that, when he is twelve, he will have no trouble with the exam, and that he will make a great hunter. In the meantime, he makes for great company, and does not put up a fuss when Kite is going somewhere that he can’t bring him, content to wait for him, and incredibly self-sufficient.

The early days together, it is easy to pretend that he is just doing this to give the boy a more worldly education, so that he will be ready for his exam when the day comes. Now that he knows about his father, the very much alive hunter, a fire has been lit under him, and if Kite had left him behind on Whale Island, he would still end up taking the exam, would find a way whether that aunt of his let him or not. Like this, at least, he can get some experience in the real world, rather than only relying on the skills honed in such a limited environment.

Kite is doing him a favor, and he does not mind the company. There is nothing wrong with that, nothing wrong with wanting an energetic and happy-go-lucky child to keep him company, and he has always loved helping others, in any way that he can. Ging helped him once, and it changed his entire life, so he likes to help out wherever he can, hoping to spread that kind of fortune wherever he goes. It almost feels like things have come full circle, for him to put so much work into mentoring the son of the man who mentored him.

It has nothing to do with his personal feelings where Ging in concerned, and he can be sure of that. At least, in the early days, he can be sure of that, but as Gon grows, he is more and more like his father. There is still that happy innocence in his face, somewhat different from what he sees in Ging, even in his most boyish, excited expressions, and he is as clingy as can be with Kite. Even when he does not fuss about being left alone, and he is always immediately upon Kite as soon as he returns, and never wants to let him out of his sight when the two of them are together, so he has not developed Ging’s independence, or penchant for leaving.

If Kite has any say in it, he will never develop that.

But in so many ways, the two of them are just alike, two of a kind, and that makes it hard for Kite to keep pretending that he did not do this for entirely selfish reasons. He misses Ging, in ways that he knows Ging is never going to miss him, and when he has someone like Gon around, he can take his mind off of that, can ease that ache, even though it is hardly fair to the boy.

He tries to keep his mind off of his own feelings, but it becomes suddenly difficult, when he realizes that it will not be much longer now before Gon’s send off. After Kite spent so long preparing him for the exam, it should not have been possible to forget that it was coming, but it still feels like it has sneaked up on them both, and suddenly, Kite is worried. He is worried about sending Gon away, worried about sending Gon into danger even though he knows that he can handle it, and more than that, he is worried about Gon not returning to him, once it is over.

He is not worried about Gon dying during the exam, and even less worried about Gon failing. No matter what, Kite is certain that Ging’s son can handle whatever they might throw at him this year, but it is what comes after that worries Kite. Despite giving Gon a rather worldly education, there are still things that he has never seen before, and his adventurous spirit will be captivated by all of this and more. He might be overcome with the desire to roam now that he has his license, now that he has his freedom to go wherever he wants.

There is a possibility that Kite is going to be left all alone again, and it worries him. Even knowing that it is not fair, that none of the feelings that he has projected onto Gon are fair, he still worries, and worries that he is going to be left alone, that he is going to lose the boy who has become so important to him, perhaps even more important than the man that he is here to replace.

Because, no matter what Kite may _tell_ himself, he knows that Gon is there to replace Ging, always has been. They have an entirely different bond, an entirely different relationship, and that is what makes it seem that much more important, but that one simple fact is still true, and Kite does not want to lose him. He is being unfair, has been unfair from the start, but he needs to make sure, if he sends Gon off, that Gon is going to return to him.

There is always the possibility of trying to keep Gon from taking the exam, maybe convincing him that he is not ready yet, but if that even works, it will perhaps work for a year or two, before Gon figures out the truth and runs away, and that is if he doesn’t do so right away. And, as terrifying as the idea of being separated for that time may be, if Gon does return to him, then there will be nowhere that Kite goes that he can’t bring Gon along with him. There are more benefits to letting him get his license than keeping him from it, there is just that one very big, very real risk of never seeing him again.

So Kite has to make sure that Gon has a good reason for coming home to him.

~X~

At first, he just talks about the celebration that the two of them will have, once Gon comes back with as an officially licensed hunter. Gon will fluster the first few times, saying that Kite should not hype it up that much, because he doesn’t want to disappoint him. However, whenever Kite points out that they both know Gon will pass, the boy is not able to deny it, and eventually, he stops trying to act humble, and instead talks about how excited he is for that celebration.

“But what’s even more exciting than that,” he says one day, “is when we go look for my dad! I want to show him my license, and I bet you’re going to want to show off too! You know, since you trained me and everything.”

Of course. How could Kite have forgotten the most important factor, the common thread that brought them together in the first place? Gon wants to meet his father again, and Kite has told him before that he should be more than equipped to track him down once he gets his hunter’s license, but that Ging is not easy prey, and will be incredibly difficult to find. But, he has always promised him, he will not be alone when he does it.

“Right, of course,” Kite agrees with a nod. “The two of us can work together to find him. I know him pretty well, and you’re his son. Between the two of us, I think we’ll make a pretty good team.”

For a brief, paranoid moment, he has the sudden fear that Gon will shake his head and declare that it will not count if he does not do it on his own. Kite has never considered that before now, but he worries that Gon, son of headstrong and independent Ging, will decide then and there that he can’t do this with help, that he can’t accept any help from Kite.

But he need not worry, but Gon just beams, with that big, heartbreaking smile, and says, “Right! We’re gonna be such a powerful team! Oh, but don’t worry about it getting in the way of your work. I can help you with that stuff while we’re at it, and we can work together there too!”

His answer could not be better, and for the moment, Kite is able to breathe easily. For right now, it seems like Gon has only ever thought about what he wants to do with Kite once he becomes a hunter. Surely there is nothing that he could see during the exam, no one that he could meet, that might change his mind. Surely he is going to remain loyal to the man who has done so much for him, and surely Kite is not going to lose him.

Except his worries start coming back to the surface only a few days later, even with that reassurance. Sure, that’s how Gon feels _now_ , but what if he really does change his mind, once is away? What if he meets someone capable of leading him astray, capable of convincing him that he does not need to return to Kite? The questions start flooding into his mind, and he can’t stop them, and can’t figure out an answer. Though he knows that Gon has promised to come back, _for now_ , he can’t control what happens when Gon is away from him, and that scares him.

So that is what pushes him to do something to give Gon another reason to return to him, something that he really can’t find somewhere else, something that, with any luck, no one else will try and convince him can get elsewhere. He is only twelve- there are some depraved individuals in the world, but all Kite can do is hope that Gon does not happen upon them. Even that is an incredibly big risk, and he will not be able to stop himself from worrying about that, but at the very least, he will have just a little bit more control in the situation, a little bit less to worry about.

And by now, he understands just how deep his feelings for Gon go. For so long, he has tried to deny it, not wanting to be one of those depraved individuals, but now, he sees that acting on those impulses might be necessary. He has changed, since taking the boy under his wing, and perhaps he has not changed for the better. Ging changed him as well, for the better when they met, for the worse when he left. Every change that occurs as a result of his relationship with Gon is just more lingering effects from Ging’s abandonment. Nothing that happens to Kite is Gon’s fault, and Gon still deserves to be taken care of.

Isn’t he taking care of him like this, though? He is just doing what he has to do to make sure that Gon does not end up in the care of someone worse, of someone who really would use and hurt him. Kite has only ever wanted to help others; sometimes, he feels like he is losing his mind, more and more often lately.

He lays down with Gon one night, holding him close. Gon is surprised by this, because Kite has never been particularly touchy-feely. When he was younger, when their journey first began, Gon would be a bit clingy on some nights, because he missed home, missed being able to cling to Mito, and Kite would take sympathy on him and hold him close, but all the while, he could feel those feelings bubbling up, doing everything that he could to crush them, to forget them. Tonight, he lets them rule.

“What are you doing?” asks Gon. “Are you cold?”

“Something like that.” Kite pauses for a moment. “I’m going to miss you, you know. You leave in a few days.”

“Aw, you’ll be alright! I’ll be back before you know it!” he promises. Though Kite doubts the wait will be as easy as that, he can only pray that Gon does return that easily. He has to make sure that it happens.

“I know, but I wanted to spend what time with you I could,” he says, in a low voice. He rests a hand against Gon’s stomach, and Gon squirms under his touch, making a noise of discomfort that Kite tries to ignore. “I just want to know that you are really are coming home.”

“I am, I am! I’m not going to let anything happen to me, I have to find my dad!” Gon replies, as if reciting lines. He seems nervous, which is rare for him, but Kite presses on, moving his hand down, pushing it beneath his pajama bottoms. Immediately, he discovers the source of Gon’s nerves- the boy is already hard. Kite’s breath catches in his throat, and he hopes it is not a coincidence, that he was not already excited before Kite ever got into bed with him, that this is a direct result of that.

“I want to give you something to come home to,” Kite replies, and Gon whimpers as he wraps a hand around his cock. “I want to show you something that I can do for you, something you’ll really like. That can be part of your celebration, when you come home.”

Kite is not actually sure what he is expecting from this. For all he knows, this could completely backfire. He has done his best to raise Gon to trust him unconditionally, but he has no idea what lessons Mito impressed on him when he was still young, and if those lessons might raise red flags. He could jump away, knowing better than to let a grown man touch him, but instead, he whimpers again, relaxing under Kite’s touch.

“I…think I do like that,” he replies, and Kite feels like he is being crushed under the weight of his relief. There is not much talking after that, as he slowly works his hand up and down, making Gon whine and pant for him, until he is begging him to do more, to go faster. Kite is not a tease tonight, giving Gon everything that he needs, and by the end, he is achingly hard himself, but he does not ask for anything in return.

Though the wait will kill him, he decides he will wait on that until Gon returns to him. It will be his own reward for his patience, and for trusting Gon enough to let him leave, allowing himself to firmly believe that Gon is going to come home to him. There is still no real guarantee that he will not turn flighty like his father, and no guarantee that he will not meet someone to lure him away, but for now, Kite has done everything that he can to try and prevent that.

He can only hope that it is enough, and trust Gon to come back home to him in time.

**Author's Note:**

> If you're interested in my writing updates, please follow my fanfiction twitter @WattStalf


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